Out of Kilter

     I have been out of kilter all week starting with the disruption of sleep Friday night because of Joe's late night poker party.  I have also been on an emotional roller coaster, as I celebrate the good in my life and weep over the bad.
     I like this work of art- "Slightly Out of Kilter", by Christine Annas.

     I woke up Saturday morning short on sleep and a bit grumpy.  I worked very hard on school work all morning.  After lunch, I went up to take a nap. 
I was abruptly interrupted by Joe
hollerin' for me, wondering where I was at.  I got up feeling really off kilter, but managed to putter around outside helping Joe for a little bit. Another trunk from and for Dan was delivered by the mail man.  I was wondering where he was going to sleep when he gets home because this is what his bed looked like.  I was thinking maybe Britney's guest room.

     Late in the afternoon I loaded Roni and headed off to Moraine View to ride with Lisa and her boys.  Shortly after heading out, Lisa checked saddles.

     It was a perfect day for a ride.  The wind had died down, the sun was shinning, and it was in the mid 60's.

    
     We stayed in the meadows much of the time because some of the trails were kind of muddy.  Roni did not tail gate Mark as much, and walked calmly most of the time.  We all enjoyed ourselves.  The Wigging's had to head back to camp after an hour, so I turned Roni and kept him going on around another section of fields next to the woods.  He did well on his own.

     Once back to the campground and un-tacked, I let Roni snack on the good green stuff.












     I loaded Roni, who always walks right into the trailer without a fuss. And we hit the road for home.

    
 
  
     Once home I cleaned the inside of the trailer with soap and water because Roni had peed in it, and there was still cow manure left from Sir Loin and Norman.

     Joe added a row of boards to the fence around our birch tree in the paddock, and replaced two broken boards.  Now the horses and cows can't stick their heads between the boards and break them.  I helped Joe move the electro-braid fence out of the paddock and into the side pasture for some additional grazing.  Now we will have to keep the 3 horses and 2 cows together in the paddock some of the time.





     Joe was up and headed to work at 4:30 Sunday, so I got up to get some school work done.  I headed to Church at 7:30 to work in the nursery.  After second service, I spent over an hour at school xeroxing papers for next week.  Will this be my last weekend to go into work?  Probably not... but at least there aren't too many weekends left. 
    
     I was debating going for a ride, but it was very windy and rather cold.  I sat on the couch grading papers and was soon lying there taking a nap.  Joe ended up working all day, so I did all the chores for a change.  I could not get the horses to come into the barn at 9 pm.  They and the cows were racing around the paddock like maniacs.  Zorro finally came up to me and I haltered and walked him into the barn.  It was another ten minutes before I could get Roni.  The way he and Amiga were racing around... I would have no idea that she was lame.  I really think she and Zorro are much better.  

     Monday I was awaken by Joe getting home at 3:30 am.  That was a 23 hour day for him, which is just CRAZY!  I tossed and turned, trying to get back to sleep and finally got up at 4:30.  I was scrambling to get more grading done and then I got a phone call from Marj, with horrible news.  Her husband Richard had fallen from the hayloft yesterday, and landed on his head.  He had to have surgery to remove part of his skull and the bruised brain tissue.  Suddenly my little worries seemed so petty, and life was askew.  I prayed and cried several times throughout the day.  It is impossible to make sense of such a tragic event and difficult to know what to do.  For anyone interested in supporting Richard and Marj, and the rest of the family, there is a CaringBridge site you may visit.
    
     I was on an emotional roller coaster all day.  I was so sad about Richard, but also got news that Dan had been released and was able to come home. It didn't help that I was sleep deprived.  I had to buy feed at Farm and Fleet and food at Wal-Mart, so hit both stores on the way home from school.   I also wanted to get a little something for Dan and Marj.  Jumping for joy at our son's return and falling to my knees in prayer for Richard... I fumbled through the isles trying to figure out what to get each.  I also wanted to buy something to fix for a home coming dinner for Dan and to provide a meal for the Gilmore's.  Being such a rotten cook, I struck out on this task as well.  The grading did not go well once home.  Joe left to get Dan and I went to
                                                     Growth Group.  On the way home
I dropped in to visit Marj.  It was good to hug her and talk with her. It was almost 10 pm by the time I got home.   I tried again to work on grading.  The conversation with Marj was on my mind as was the excitement of Dan coming home.  "Don't let the devil steal away your peace. Give thanks to God in all occasions."


     Dan's Unit at an Award's Ceremony at Bagram Airfield in Afghanistan.

      Joe and Dan arrived a little after 11 pm.  More of his stuff was hauled into the house and deposited on the dinning room floor.  Dan was in bed very quickly, and Joe and I were soon to follow.  I peeked in on Dan and he was already asleep with the lights on and the cat by his side.

     Tuesday I discovered that it is such a small world.  One of my students mentioned that his uncle just got home from Afghanistan when I was telling the class about Dan's arrival home.  Come to find out, my student's uncle is Dan's platoon sergeant.  How cool is that? 

     The day was warmer, but overcast.  I was late getting to school and had several little issues that did not help my malfunctioning self. The e-mail on my work lap top was out of whack last week, with some virus or something.  So the IT person came and re-imaged it.  Getting it back Monday, it was missing programs and desk top icons.  I got it to where it would be usable until school is out.  And then Tuesday morning the same virus problem arose.  So... I decided to just retire the lap top early.  I'll get by without it... only 17 days of school left as of now.

     I should have gone for a ride since
it was so nice out, but I really had way too much school work to attend to.  My home lap top would not let me enter grades onto the Skyward Grade book.  Having this on the fritz really put me in a funk.  I went out to catch up on chores, filling feed bins, dumping and filling water containers, filling the bird feeder and bird bath, etc. 

     The broody hen finally gave up on the nest in the barn and has joined the flock.  She seems much happier running around with them... catching bugs and eating grubs.  Dan went for a jog and has then been busy unpacking many of his boxes and crates, sorting and organizing everything.  Here is his welcome Home Warrior Flag we are proudly displaying.
 









   
     Dan also has several metals and got this memento flag honoring his military service.  I put it under the Holiday tree I decorated for "Welcome Home Dan" and Memorial Day.

      

     Joe and I both got some gifts from Dan.  This one he bought at the market in Afghanistan.  It is all out of one piece of wood, and is really cool looking.  We enjoyed a nice dinner and talked about Dan's future plans that I was thrilled he was thinking about.

      Some e-mail communications with Marj brought reassurance as well as empathy.  This whole ordeal with Richard is going to be a long up-hill road. Once again, the school work was moving along at a snail's pace.

     They have been busy over at Becks.  Much of the planting is done.

     Wednesday morning our home internet was out.  I figured Dan must have done something to it the night before.  It put me out of sync not to be able to touch base with the world beyond our farm.  I went to school early so I could read and answer e-mails.

     Mid afternoon, Joe, Dan and I went to Marj and Richards to help with cleaning stalls.  Courtney joined us there shortly after.  Natalie and Ryan had already started, so we dove right in, dividing up the work.  It did not take long at all.  We enjoyed watching the 17 horses come in off the pastures for their evening feed and stall rest.

      Once home, Joe grilled chicken while I cooked the rice and green beans and we four enjoyed a good meal together.  I had plenty of chores here to attend to, so again did not get enough grading done.  I realize, I grade too much.  Oh well, a little too late to change now. :-)

     Dan continues to settle in here on the farm.  He has been sleeping in Britney's room, watching a movie each night, using his projector and the wall as a screen. 

     He is a strange and silly young man.  The soldiers of the 236th enjoyed this handy technology that Dan occasionally set up and shared while at Bagram.


      I met Courtney at Gilmore's at 6 am Thursday.  We fed all of the horses and then turned them out to their specified pasture.  Such a peaceful start to the day watching them trot off to eat.  I had to hit the post office in Downs on the way to school, to return an incorrect delivery and then scramble on grading a few more papers.

     Our horses get a little time on this grass each day when I get home from school.





     I went to a late afternoon appointment about retirement, only coming away with one important piece of information.  It was for those thinking about retiring using the district incentive... which did not apply to me.  I did get two assignments graded.  Nothing like being a captive audience to allow me to focus on grading.

     I was very glad to see this week come to an end.  It has been a very disjointed week.  I am getting used to having Daniel back in the house although I have caught myself going to the bathroom without shutting the door, or dressing up in my bedroom with that door wide open.  There seems to be a lot more dishes in the sink and extra distractions from grading.  I am not complaining... just readjusting.  Richard shows little improvement and is still in a coma.  So that too has me concerned, upset, worried, and out of kilter.  I keep turning to God in prayer.
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